Wow! it has been quite some time since my previous entry..
a lot have been going on
an event that marked my journey as a mom
After i've been hit by a cold since last 2 weeks on tuesday, i took a chance for rest that doctor gave to me to spend with my baby. you must be wondering why it was so important to me. it was because on the wednesday i've been selected to participate with a 2 days and 1 night team building at Cope Adventure, Ampang. Though the location wasn't far, i knew that i have to spend there for 1 night ... without my baby. what i felt that time was a mixed emotions. the adventure of jungle tracking, paint ball and night walking were exciting, but on the other hand, leaving my baby, spending a night without her was really painful.
Though my cold was showing no sign of improvement, i know that i have to go. Packed a few t-shirts and trackbottom, along with my spectra and a few 8 oz bottles, i was ready to go. Not forgetting my not-so-many stocks of bm, i labeled each bottle with numbers and time for feeding, just in case my sister wasnt sure when to feed Lissa.. just some estimation about 2-3 hours gap between feeding (my sister took 2-day leave just to make sure that she could babysit Lissa) and there you go, all my stocks were all labeled, nothing left in the freezer. so frustrated that i hv to make new stocks, and build up again.gosh..
The Tuesday morning came, my heart was so not in place.. i was getting ready to go when suddenly Lissa opened her eyes, and started to smile at me. my heart melted there and then. i fed her,just to make sure she's ok when i left her. i took her to my sis, whom was still sleeping, of course! (it was 6:15 in the morning) had to be at HQ for bus at 6:45 am. when i was about to leave, Lissa just looked at me, confused.. i knew i had to just leave, shut the door and leave...trying to focus on the excitement of having to explore on new environment, fresher air and new fun activities. i placed in my mind that it is now time for me to rest. let my husband does all the chores & taking care of Lissa (though my sis had to do that..). Come to think of it, it was a break for me. It was indeed my first break of my motherhood..hehe..
After i came back, my sis told me that Lissa wasnt crying at all.. but.. she seemed like to look for me at night, and even sucked my sis's elbow.. so funny, and also touchy.. i made a promise to myself, whatever it is after this, i wont be gone leaving my daughter behind, until she's at least 1 year old (hmm which is gonna be another 2 months..) fair, right?